I’ve often imagined being a rich, famous, and well respected author. I would use less words per sentence, but more flowery speech. I would say things like,
“Yes, dear, that was a lovely Cabernet. I particularly enjoyed the bouquet of cherry and hint of chocolate undertones.”
and
“My darling, I’m not quite sure that I agree with your assessment of this week’s The Tudors but I still respect you nonetheless. Perhaps my agent will be so kind as to set up a tea with the cast Sunday next and we can discuss each of our theories with them then.”
My list of book titles would be expansive.
- How To Write A Short Story and then not finish it
- Book Of Useless Poetry
- Things You Should Never Say To Your Children but probably say every day anyway
- How To Do It All Wrong And Still Have A Successful Marriage
- How To Have A Successful Relationship With Your Mom When She’s Your Facebook Friend
- When You Have One Baby Milestone Book And Three Kids
- When Even The Cats Are Girls
- Green Tea Tastes Like Grass but I love it anyway
- How To Cook Using Chocolate As Much As Possible
- How To Wing It And Not Let On
- When Your Cats Love You More Than Your Kids D0
- Self Taught Chef-ing On A Ridiculous Budget
- No, My Life Isn’t a Dramedy In Spite Of My Blog
- At Least My Life Isn’t a Soap Opera
- I Love My In-Laws; Am I Crazy?
- How To Gain Weight Even When You Eat Right
- How To Be A Horrible Housekeeper and still keep up appearances
- All The Reasons To Wake Up Every Morning although mainly it’s because you can’t sleep in
- Criss Cross Applesauce and other stupid phrases school taught my kids
- How Life Turned Me Into An Advocate
- What I Want To Be When I Grow Up… and other things I can put off until tomorrow
- Why Birthdays Are Important To Celebrate For Everyone
- 1-2-3 Can Mommy Have a Time Out Now?
- How To Make Marriage Work Even When One Of You Snores
- Living With What Life Throws At You and maintaining faith while still standing
Hmmm. I think I can turn several of those “book titles” into blog posts. Ding!